Why doesn't anyone care?

It is hard to work with students. It is difficult to be a young person in the church. Today I just feel like no one cares. If we just quit doing student ministry, would anyone else on staff even notice? Would they even care? I guess I am biased, but I so believe in my generation. I believe that we can make a difference. I believe that we can be a vital part of the body of Christ. Would someone please just give us a chance? Why doesn't the church value young people? Why would you not pour out your life to mentor and love on teenagers? They are our future! They have such passion and amazing gifts! Sometimes I get so frustrated I just want to quit. But today, I am just so damn hurt that the church de-values students like they do, and in turn de-values the work and hearts of those who love and advocate for them. Lord, please give us the strength to perservere and make a difference. May you be glorified in this conversation.

International Justice Mission

I had a meeting last week with Bethany who works at Internation Justice Mission (IJM). I was overcome with what is going on in our world and how the church of Jesus Christ needs to step up! There is so much injustice all around the world. I wholeheartedly believe that we as the body of Christ need to be educated about these things and take action. Please visit www.ijm.org for more info!

AHHHHH! Somtimes I can't stand church!!!!!!

Today was just one of those days. Normally, I try really hard to check my attitude about church at the door when I walk into a service. Especially a service that is just not me. But today, I couldn't hang! I walked in to the hyped up show, and my heart just sank. I get SO angry! I really can't stand church a lot of the time. Here, I come off of this beautiful weekend of intimate worship with fellow followers of Christ, and then I walk into this circus of a mega church. It was almost comical to me, as I could not stand it anymore, I got up and left. At the same time, 3 of my other, young friends got up and left the service too. We were all feeling the exact same way. I feel badly about my negative attitude, but at the same time, I truly feel like this way of "doing church" is not right. In fact, it makes me crazy! How can you not involve the younger generation at all? How can you play the latest, hip Christian music and screw it up so badly? Why has worshipping God become strictly entertainment to satisfy the masses? I am so sick of this that it makes me nauseous! It makes me contemplate just not doing the church thing anymore. It is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO stupid!!!

Sacred space

Here are two images from the prayer chapel we had available to the leaders at the Willow Creek Leadership Summit. Enjoy!

Experiencing God

The last two days have been spent creating and providing space for nearly 1000 church leaders to encounter Christ. It is so evident to me how badly each of us need this space, and often! It is funny to me when people criticize a more traditional church environment, or a space some may label "emergent." All you have to do is walk into a space like this, stand back, and observe people being themselves before God. I love quiet, candle lit, intimate worship. There is just nothing like it! Sure, there is always a time for celebratory, loud, fun worship. I am all for it! However, when the psalmist writes "Be quiet, be still, and know that I am God." Psalm 46. WOW, there is so much truth in that. In our fast paced, busy lives, how often do we honestly lay all of the distractions aside and just hang out in the presence of our Maker?

Question... When was the last time it was just you and God?

Why Can't I Just Be Me? Part 1

The darkness surrounds me. Where do you find the light when the darkness surrounds you? The worst part is that the church can be so judgemental and cruel that none of us can be honest about who we are and what is really going on. We all talk about being real and being authentic, and I believe that is our desire. But is it possible? WOW, if we were just able to put down the masks, can you imagine the healing that might come? If you really think about it, do you really believe that other Christ followers don't struggle? YEAH RIGHT! Maybe they are just better at hiding it than me.

Read Psalm 88

Thoughts to come...

Here are the writings I am tossing around in my head and will be appearing on this blog over the next few weeks...

"Haircuts"- John 15

"Why Can't I just be me?"- The church is not a safe place to be real about who we really are

"I find Christ in my Honda"- Heartbreak over the lack of opportunities to worship with reckless abandon

"My disreguard of God's Word"- my lack of respect, awe, fear, and reverance for the Living Word of God that sits on my nightstand, on my desk, on my coffee table and in my car.

"Communion/ Eucharist"- Thoughts on denominational doctorine that prevents Christ followers from being able to experience the Lord's Supper together.

"Prebythodistutheranaptistocastalic"- Can't I just follow Jesus? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! Need I say more???

Muted Light

I was reading a novel last night, and stumbled across a phrase that really struck me. Muted light. I have never heard it said like that. I immediatley saw the connection to my life, and what I am experiencing this week. Today is day 8 of a migraine for me and now a deep sense of depression. I can't stand it that I get to this place every few months. It makes me laugh, because a lot of what I do is talk to people who struggle with depression and try to encourage them. (ironic huh?) Then, I spend my time trying to figure out how to most effecticely communicate hope to the masses. The hope of Christ that is. Why then does it not translate to my own heart?

Christ says in Matthew 5:14 that "You are the Light of the World. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead, they put it on a stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father who is in Heaven."

So, I am the light of the world, right? I should be reflecting the Light of Christ. The Light of the World! Why then has my light become muted? It is still there. I know that. But why does it not shine brightly today?

Remember the little kids song that we all learned in 2 year old Sunday school class? "This little light of mine. I'm going to let it shine...." The more I think about that song, the more it makes me mad. Did the author of that song read what Jesus said in Matthew 5? It is NOT a little light. It is the light of the world!!! We are called to be that city on a hill that shines so bright in a world that is so dark.

Question for today... How do we keep our light on its stand for the whole world to see and not let the darkness of the world cause it to be muted?

Early Morning Thoughts

I am on day 5 of having a migraine, and my brain is so blurry now that it is hard to tell what I am really feeling or thinking. I have had multiple conversations in the last two days that have promted lots of thought on things. Is my hope and dream for a church just to be bigger and better than everyone else? If so, is that what Christ cares about? I would think not. I have so many thoughts and emotions about church that it is hard to make sense of it all. How would I make things different? Could God really use me at all? Is there even hope?

Question for the day...
What would your ideal church look like?